For some reason I feel the urge to offer a bad analogy on this.
Carmody was that patient, kind, understanding---but ultimately unfulfilling--girlfriend (or boyfriend) you took up with after two decades of crappy marriage. You tried your best to make that marriage work, trying different therapists and communication styles, but ultimately two decades of disappointment was too much. You divorced, and by chance you met up with an unusual but grounded person who showed you that life could be different. With her (or him), you started to see the world differently, not dreading evenings out, the silly fights, and inattentiveness. She (he) was a bit unorthodox, with different views, but she (he) was patient, caring, and a good teacher---exactly what you needed. You saw that life could be "normal." It was great. For awhile.
But over time you saw that the relationship had limits. You began to feel that things were "topping out." You were back on your feet, but you wanted to reach higher. And you felt that she (he), despite the many gifts she had brought to you, was not the partner you needed.
Enter the Next One. By chance you met her (him), but you got the feeling that she was sent to you. She had the vision, the energy, the smarts, and the verve to dare you to go higher. You opened up your heart and your mind to her, and she took you to a new place. It all happened so fast, but you feel that you were made to be together. You feel very lucky. You are alive after living through decades of death.